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The Cruise Ship Bar Joke

They say laughter is the best medicine, and nothing beats a clever joke to brighten your day. Here’s one that’s guaranteed to leave you smiling—maybe even with tears of laughter. So, sit back, relax, and enjoy this witty tale.

A woman walks up to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with just two drops of water. The bartender, slightly puzzled but accommodating, serves her the drink.

As she accepts it, she smiles and says, “I’m celebrating my 80th birthday today, and this cruise is my gift to myself.”

The bartender, touched by the occasion, replies warmly: “Happy birthday! This drink is on the house.”

When she finishes, the woman sitting beside her—caught up in the celebratory spirit—offers: “Let me buy you your next drink.”

The birthday lady nods graciously and once again requests: “A Scotch with two drops of water, please.”

The bartender serves it up without hesitation.

A moment later, a man on her other side decides to join in: “Allow me to buy you one as well.”

The woman accepts with a smile, and once again she orders: “A Scotch with two drops of water.”

This time, the bartender’s curiosity gets the better of him. Handing her the glass, he asks:

“Ma’am, I just have to know—why the Scotch with only two drops of water?”

With a cheeky grin and a sparkle in her eye, the woman replies:

“Young man, at my age I can handle my liquor just fine… but holding my water is another story entirely.”

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